Ziplining Navitat and Life After….

There is a place in North Carolina where you can be suspended 220 feet off the ground, zipping from one high mountain ridge to another ridge via zip line at 45-50 MPH in total safety and abandon.  If you’ve never done it, you owe yourself a trip with our Navitat tour guides Michael and John – two of the best tour guides that I’ve ever run the rails with.  Michael is a botany expert and has an infectious personality that makes you want to smile.  John?  An endless supply of great jokes and a wonderful zip partner.

Here is the joke….what do you call a deer with no eyes?  You will have to read on to find out.

I have one word for anyone in central or eastern US that needs a great weekend out. Navitat.

Navitat is one of the top ten zip companies in the US, and the fourth on my list of places that I want to visit before those horrific initials M and S become part of my unavoidable landscape.  Click the link to check out the worthwhile canopy tour amidst the beauty of the most diverse flora, fauna and ecosystem that you can find on the eastern seaboard.  Life without the dense foliage, trees and awesome landscape of the forest?  Not for me.  It’s an amazing 4 hours.

So, have you figured out the joke yet?  What do you call a deer with no eyes?

No idea-r.

He he.  I didn’t say they were good jokes, just funny as hell when your swinging from the trees.

A question from a reader this weekend had me thinking…..”when does it get better?”  By “it,” she was referring to a relationship that ended, leaving her emotionally bleeding out.  Answer:  it’s one step at a time, one foot in front of the other.  What you chose to think about and how you care for yourself will dictate how you feel about your life sooner than you might expect, weather that loss is from a death, a breakup, divorce, job loss or simply from the depths of depression.

It is okay that you miss him/her. Honor the memory and go on. Have the dignity of knowing that you're capable of anything.'s a great catalyst. Be what you imagine.

I find that I keep myself moving forward without being so busy that I don’t really deal with my feelings.  In fact, I confront the truth as often as I can take the idea that “forever” is a pretty permanent thing.  I have a “wall climbing date” with a helpful instructor on Wednesday at BSU.  I am engaging with my new school, who deserves a big congrats for winning the IU vs. Ball State football season opener at the Colt’s home field, Lucas Oil Stadium.

Wall climbing is a great upper body workout without any impact potential (unless you fall) and it’s a great place to work on your balance and confidence.  I’m starting a physical rehab phase in life to get back what I lost over the past six months.  I’m pumped to be working out again.  Like all of you in relationship or addiction recovery, I have the moments that I am not okay with still being on the path of recovery from that overwhelming sense of grief.

But here I stand.

I listen to lots of music…new music that I am just discovering.  In addition to the groups that I love, I’ve discovered the music of Colbie Calliet, Marie Digby, The Fray, Adele, and A Fine Frenzy.  I am encouraged by my friends and family that love me beyond reason, and the love that I find in every place.  Pretty happy to have accepted the ordination of Universal Christian Churches this last weekend, and looking forward to all that entails as I am able to really explore the pluralistic ideas of Christ in life, not the limits of what I have known.

Still, the question of love and loss is one that we hear and feel often in human life.  As I flew through the air this weekend, there were two people, one in the United Arab Eremites and one in the nation of Brazil….and they asked the same question  thirty seconds apart.  “How do I let him go?”  I’ve written extensively on that here at THM, and I’d recommend that if you’re hurting, you go back and find the other articles.  I found something that really helped me this weekend.

Be you.  Just be you.  There is no one better for you…or that you’re better at.  If they don’t love you at your worst, they don’t deserve you at your best.  Trust me…I loved regardless, and it was always worthwhile.  Today, the same is true.

Really….find out who you are and love that.  I can’t tell you that you won’t miss him or her every second of every day.  D and I did what is called the “Empty Chair” exercise with a twist this weekend.   Facing an empty chair with a single sheet of paper or a stone, tell your feelings and your needs to that person who is missing from your life.  Let it all out.  Write on the paper or stone, whatever item makes sense for you.  Then….when you’re done, let it go.  Set it free, bury it, whatever appeals to your sense of healing….but let it stay behind you.  Letting go of the feelings…that allows the fond memory to grow and the pain to leave. You have to forgive and show grace…to yourself, to those you leave in life’s journey. Don’t be unkind and cruel. Show honor, and live a life that includes caring for the pain of others…but not living in it.

Life after…….for each of us, it’s different.

Be well, blessed and loved.



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